I am still working on trying to slow down, say less, spend more time taking in what the other person has said and acknowledging it (e.g. by reflecting back - preferably not parrot fashion). I expect I'll still be working on these aspects of communication in days, months, years to come. As we go into the last week of the appeal, I find myself thinking about doing another one at some point. It feels like it would be a bit of a waste not to put all that I've learnt during these past weeks to use again in some way.
An image that comes to mind is of trying to master one of those trick bicycles where the front wheel turns in the opposite direction to the way you steer the handlebars. There are brief moments of exhilaration when I think I've got the hang of it and feel like I'm getting somewhere. Then I fall off again. Most times I dust myself down metaphorically speaking, and I want to get on and try again fairly readily. It's going to take a long long time to get the hang of it, if I ever do. But it's utterly compelling giving it a go.
Outside the air is a lot cooler. It's getting darker earlier and really starting to feel like autumn proper. Having knocked on many doors and met a lot of people now, I'm left with some overall or general impressions. One is that the vast majority of people (almost everyone) are giving to charity in some way. The other lasting impression is of how many people's lives are touched by bereavement or tragedy of some kind.
It's as though there's a hidden mustard seed teaching in fundraising. I've been a bit surprised how many people have said to me when I knock on their door that it's not a good time - they've recently lost a loved one, or that someone in the family has been injured in an accident. Then of course I throw out all notions of eliciting standing orders, and try to express some sympathy. That usually seems appreciated and there's a sense of relief.
Tonight I walked around a street corner feeling upset and disputatious. I found a starling dead in pool of dirty water in the gutter. It didn't seem right. I took it as a reminder that in reality there is no time for quarrelling. I know it won't be long before I forget again, but I appreciated the reminder.
